I really just want to write about something light hearted and easy going, but my mind couldn't be further from that. I've been scaring myself lately. Maybe it's S.A.D, or maybe I just have a cold coming on..but if I could, I would lay in my bed all day. I don't want to do anything. I don't want to see anyone..and this isn't meant to offend anybody, I love my friends, it's just that I can't imagine myself enjoying anything right now. I could be the most popular girl in school, surrounded by everyone, and I still think I wouldn't be able to shake this lonliness I feel. I almost feel...misplaced maybe. I'm not supposed to be here. I'm supposed to be experiencing something much bigger, much more exciting, and I am sulking around in response to that. I've heard so much that it's God I'm missing out on. That He is the thing I'm missing. Is He? Or is it ...life...that I'm yearning for yet avoiding? I'm so confused and my bed seems safe and comforting. Sleep through it. This will end...
hopefully.
1 comment:
I feel the same way too. its not god, its a boy. someone to be intimate with and fall in love with. you could give me all the friends in the world and I'll still feel lonely because I have nobody to love and to love me back...that's my theory...that's why I'm lonely and sad.
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